Calculated Risk


My toes clung to the edge of the diving board. I took a deep breath and tried to convince myself to dive in…

Yesterday while our family was swimming at the public pool, my husband went off the diving board over and over again. Each time my 5yo son and I laughed at his attempts at cannonballs and running dives; grading them with two thumbs up or down. 

“Why don’t you try a dive, Mommy?” Wolfy asked me. 
The question caught me off guard. For the past five years, I’ve been pretending around my son that I love swimming but the truth is that I don’t feel super comfortable in the water. I can go off the diving board with a clumsy jump but going head first into the water was the last thing I wanted to do. 
Wolfy is struggling to learn to swim this year. He’s making a lot of progress but it’s always two steps (or strokes) forward and one step back. He doesn’t like to jump off the side of the pool even when his teacher promises that she will catch him. 
I want my son to know that while it’s important to listen to the voice inside your head that says something is dangerous, sometimes if it’s a safe situation, it’s okay to push past your fear and test your limits. We call it taking a Calculated Risk. 
But it’s easy to talk about this while cozily tucked into my comfort zone. And it’s another to show him that I can take Calculated Risks too. 
So tonight, I got up on the diving board. But at first I couldn’t make myself dive off. I stood there for a moment feeling the wobbling of the board and the awkwardness of knowing that half of our small town was watching me. For a moment I considered doing my usual clumsy jump. And then I bent down and dove into the water headfirst. Just like I had promised my little boy. 
He was definitely paying attention. 
“Nice job, Mom.” 

I Regret Telling My Child There Is No Easter Bunny

It’s not easy to admit you’ve made a mistake. As a parent, it’s even harder. What I did was wrong and I can’t even apologize to my son because I don’t want to remind him that for years, I told him that Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny aren’t real. I put my own ideals before the needs of my child. I strongly believe that lying to kids is wrong, but I let that get in the way of being a good mother. My little boy wanted to believe in magic. He wanted to be like the other kids and I didn’t allow that. Instead, I put myself first. Continue reading “I Regret Telling My Child There Is No Easter Bunny”

To the Woman Who Told My Son to Share

Perhaps you remember me and my son. I most certainly remember you. Remember how your son took something my kid was playing with and then you yelled at my kid that he needed to “share”?

Well, just in case, let me refresh your memory. Continue reading “To the Woman Who Told My Son to Share”

Why I Didn’t Give My Son a Pinterest-Perfect Birthday Party

Why I Decided Not to Give My Son A Pinterest-Perfect Birthday Party.jpg
I used to love throwing parties.

When I was in my early twenties, before I had children and a mortgage, I hosted some truly epic parties. I would come up with some goofy theme like “hunting camp” or “circus” or “best friends”, and just run with it. My parties featured kissing booths, bars filled with “mystery shots”, costumes, even a live polka band. I knew how to have a good time and give all my guests an experience they’d talk about for years. So what if at the end of the night there was a huge mess or even a few holes in the walls?   Continue reading “Why I Didn’t Give My Son a Pinterest-Perfect Birthday Party”

Why I Didn’t Give My Son a Pinterest-Perfect Birthday Party

Why I Decided Not to Give My Son A Pinterest-Perfect Birthday Party.jpg

I used to love throwing parties.

When I was in my early twenties, before I had children and a mortgage, I hosted some truly epic parties. I would come up with some goofy theme like “hunting camp” or “circus” or “best friends”, and just run with it. My parties featured kissing booths, bars filled with “mystery shots”, costumes, even a live polka band. I knew how to have a good time and give all my guests an experience they’d talk about for years. So what if at the end of the night there was a huge mess or even a few holes in the walls?   Continue reading “Why I Didn’t Give My Son a Pinterest-Perfect Birthday Party”

12 Things I Love About Baby’s First Year

12 THings I love About Baby's First YearToday is my baby girl’s first birthday.

It’s hard to believe that one year ago Ada came into this world. She made quite the entrance and she hasn’t stopped surprising us ever since. I can only imagine what Ada’s toddler years will have in store for our family. Continue reading “12 Things I Love About Baby’s First Year”

My Child Was Obsessed With Me

My Child Was Obsessed With Me

When my son Wolfy turned four, a big change happened. He was so proud of his new age and with it came a lot of newfound independence. He suddenly wanted to try to brush his own teeth, use sharp knives (yikes!), and attempt to wipe his own butt (also yikes!). Continue reading “My Child Was Obsessed With Me”

Chanukah, My Beloved Underdog Holiday

Chanukah, My Beloved Underdog Holiday

Last week while we were riding in the car, my four-year-old son Wolfy asked, “Are we Christmas people?”

Christmas people? What are Christmas people?

This holiday season, Wolfy has been obsessed with Christmas. At the bank, he runs to the Christmas tree grabbing my hand and pulling me along. “Look at the ornaments! See all the presents, Mommy?”

At home, The Polar Express is the book of choice at bedtime.

And when we walk downtown, he stops to exclaim over every Christmas-y thing in every window display. “A Santa Claus! And an elf! Wow!” I try to get excited along with him and also point out the menorah hovering in the back of the store window. “Yup,” he says, “A menorah. And there’s a reindeer!!!”

In the car, I suppress a sigh and answer his question, “Yes, we are ‘Christmas people’ but we are ‘Chanukah people’ too.” Continue reading “Chanukah, My Beloved Underdog Holiday”

Ditch the Breastfeeding Cover!

Ladies, can we all just agree on something? It’s time to ditch the nursing cover!

You know the ones I’m talking about; they look like a strange miniature apron. And they even come in different colors and patterns so you can coordinate them with your outfit. To use one, you sling the string around your neck and then you all that excess cloth is supposed to cover up both your breast and most of your baby. You sit under this contraption, looking sort of awkward and embarrassed, while your baby has a meal with his or her head covered. It’s a win-win, right? Wrong.

nursing cover on floor

Continue reading “Ditch the Breastfeeding Cover!”

Creating A Visual Snack Menu

Creating A Visual Snack Menu

I want my son to be fully prepared for school every morning.

My three year old boy recently started public preschool. He goes there every morning from 7:30-11:00am and they have a snack time in the middle. I’ve been so anxious about sending my son off to school. I’m excited, yes, but also a bit nervous too.

You might think that creating a visual menu for packing snack is overkill but if it makes getting ready for school easier, I’m all in.

Continue reading “Creating A Visual Snack Menu”